Are Book Blurbs Bullshit?
On the pointlessness of printing hyperbolic flattery on book covers
Authoring runs on a favor economy.
An article published recently in Esquire while I was on hiatus brought up a sore subject that has long tweaked a nerve in me: book blurbs. The shallowness and politicking of the traditional publishing industry seems perfectly encapsulated in these author endorsements indiscriminately strewn across the covers of books. Or, often worse, if you subscribe to BookBub or Kindle Daily Deals, you’ll receive book descriptions that half the time say little to nothing about the book itself but waste their word count on what others have said about it:
Who needs more info about the story itself when we have the endorsement of other authors (whose motivations are 100% pure) to guide us? Let’s just take the publishing industry’s word for it, right? When have they ever steered us wrong…?
So, what is traditional publishing’s obsession with blurbs and is indie publishing doomed to follow in its footsteps?
During my brief stint with an agent, he told me I should try to wrangle some blurbs from famous authors (or at least ones people have heard of.) Now, I have zero connections in the literary world, so I in turn asked him—as the one with, like, all the connections—wouldn’t he be the one best positioned for this task? Why don’t you go out and rustle me up some blurbs, Mr. Agent? Alas, he refused, as shameless begging is apparently some unspoken rite of passage for newbie authors. I also refused. Probably another indication that this relationship was doomed to fail.
The truth of the matter is, I despise blurbs. I don’t believe I’ve ever been swayed by one and, more often than not, I can barely read them for all the eye-rolling they induce. I mean, I’ve read some fascinating books in my day, but none of them have been important or life-changing. Give me a break. Yet nearly every blurb is borderline orgasmic over the book it adorns. This can’t be genuine, and it mocks both the book and the author blurbing it.
Besides, I honestly don’t give a shit what high-profile writers think about books because I like to make up my own mind. I’m funny that way. Which is maybe why I think the whole “influencer” phenomenon is retrograde step for civilization. So, the fact that celebrities gush over a product or particular book doesn’t mean squat to me. Am I supposed to regard their taste as superior to my own? I know what I like. The publishing industry is hardly a reliable source when it comes to recommendations as, lately, it’s done a pretty crappy job of publishing books that satisfy my taste.
…most authors secure blurbs not based on the merit of their work alone, but rather who they know.
There’s also the little known fact, and the article delves into this, that many authors don’t actually read the books they blurb and even hate the ones they praise. There are a number of perverse incentives driving this blurb system, and it’s not to be trusted as an authentic representation of, well, anything. Some publishers even allegedly pay authors for their testimonials! So, often you’re not necessarily getting an author’s honest opinion. You’re getting the results of a lot of mutual back-scratching. Or, rather, what I envision as a giant, ouroboros-like human centipede.
One bestselling author I spoke to who also asked to remain anonymous shared another perspective as to why authors blurb books they don’t like. ‘We just do,’ she said. ‘We owe someone a favor, or our agent or editor mentions it would (ahem) be really, really good to prioritize this one if you have time, or we can tell it's well done even though it's not for us, or we know we'll want a favor from that author in the future. Authoring runs on a favor economy.’
In the end, all they’re doing is spoiling some cover-designer’s artwork with a cheap advertisement in the form of another author’s insincere praise.
But the issue for me with blurbs is more visceral. I can’t imagine any living “famous” author I’d want to blurb my books. I’ll say the unsayable thing: I actively dislike pretty much all of the new books I’ve read in my supposed “comparable” categories. When agents and editors read my book, they told me my comp titles were by authors like Madeleine Miller, Signe Pike, and Linnea Hartsuyker (incidentally, all are repped by the same agency and blurb each other rather incestuously.) I would probably dispute this comparison, as my books are nothing like the first two fantasies though, in fairness, I never got past the overwrought opening of Hartsuyker’s first novel. Either way, I’d reject any attempt to put their names on my book covers. Would having Miller’s blurb on my book propel it into unimaginable notoriety? Probably. But her books are vomitous trash. Sure, I’d heartily welcome anyone’s voluntary endorsement, but I’d sooner burn my book than soil its covers with quotes from someone whose writing I didn’t respect. Indeed, I have a hard time compiling a list of mainstream authors whose endorsements I’d actually wish for. I have an even harder time imagining they’d give them:
While there’s nothing inherently wrong with relying on praise from authors and notable figures to decide which books are worthy of industry attention, most authors secure blurbs not based on the merit of their work alone, but rather who they know.
Think about it. You do the years-long work of writing a book, signing with a literary agent, and selling it to a publisher, only to be kneecapped by your lack of connections within the publishing industry….
Meg Reid, Executive Director at Hub City Writers Project, explained, ‘If you've spent any time in the industry, you know that a packed roster of blurbs often has more to do with which MFA program or elite writing conference the writer attended or the other writers in their publisher's stable, rather than whether the book is truly great or not.’
While publishers and bookstores could, you know, trust their own judgement when it comes to choosing which books to promote, they relinquish control to the cynical god of “industry connections.” Because who you know is obviously more valuable than what you write. But writing in its purest form is not a team sport and not needing help or permission to perform it is what makes it so powerful. It used to be a pursuit that favored—or at least didn’t exclude—thoughtful and talented introverts. Now it’s become an industry that decidedly favors extroverts, schmoozers, and influencers… good grief.
there should be a moratorium on them
Maybe the darkest revelation of all is that, apparently, these bogus endorsements are not even targeted at readers, but at vendors. Bookstores and other venues are meant to use author blurbs to decide which books to buy and shelve. So, despite the fact that no one likes them, readers don’t use them, and everyone agrees they’re hypocritical bullshit, they’re still a major factor driving the success of elect titles.
Yes, this is a system we can have total confidence in! They’re like an under-the-table payment stapled right to the cover of the book. They announce: “The industry so desperately wants THIS book to succeed that it’s pimping out other authors to sell it.” I don’t know about you, but I don’t feel great about that. And I don’t know why blurb authors allow themselves to be used in this way. All publicity is not good publicity, and they may feel like the coveted voice of authority in this exchange, but they come off looking like whores. Especially when it involves an endless cycle of promotional quid pro quo with one’s reputation always on the line. Every blurb accepted will one day demand a favor in kind.
So, how did we get here? According to an earlier article on the same subject in The Atlantic:
What’s behind the blurb arms race? Two things: the switch across the arts from a traditional critical culture to an internet-centered one driven by influencers and reliant on user reviews, combined with a superstar system where a handful of titles account for the great majority of sales.
Those trends have disrupted the 20th century’s dominant two-step model of book promotion, in which publishers brought out a hardback—conveying seriousness, prestige, and heft—and then a paperback about a year later. This allowed them two chances to “launch” the book, and the cheaper, more portable paperbacks could also benefit from the (hopefully) glowing reviews for the hardback in major newspapers and magazines.
That model is now broken.
So instead of harvesting effusive quotes from professional book reviewers, authors solicit them from celebrities and other writers, usually long before publication.
Neither system was perfect, but deploying the celebrity spokesmodel is just about the most pathetic form of advertisement ever invented—for buyer, seller, and especially celebrity. While I would hope most of us aren’t swayed by such tactics, apparently the entire traditional publishing industry is, which is more proof of its brokenness. If renowned writers genuinely enjoy new books they’ve read, let them write reviews or endorse them by other neutral, non-commercial means. Then we’ll know their sentiments are sincere and not the product of some mutual back-scratching scheme. An obliged endorsement is an anti-endorsement. It will always be suspect. Mark Richards of Swift Publishing said of blurbs in an interview with The Atlantic:
My own personal view is that there should be a moratorium on them—that we as editors should collectively decide not to put any on any of our books for a year, and reclaim our own taste…
Amen. Sadly, book blurbs are unlikely to die anytime soon, and I know for selfish reasons I should get on the bandwagon and embrace them. But I just don’t see myself soliciting ads to slap on the cover of my book. Maybe I’m my own worst enemy there. Then again, that’s why I’m an indie author—so I don’t have to suck up to the industry or anyone in it when deciding how to proceed with my books. I guess I can add blurbs to that list of favors I won’t be seeking any time soon. I also believe it’s for the greater good.
Is the indie publishing world doomed to go down the same road traditional publishers now lament having taken with this blurb b.s.? That’s something we get to decide. We don’t have to blindly follow the same failed patterns of traditional publishing. I wish for the day when book covers will once again be unsullied by the meaningless one-liners of insincere authors whose opinions never mattered in the first place. It’s not too late to turn that ship around if we choose, and indie authors have the ability to create a different kind of publishing space, or else what is independent publishing for?
Have I gone overboard? ;-) How do you feel about blurbs, especially in indie publishing? Are they a useful tool, or should they be retired? Do you rely on blurbs when choosing books? Who would you choose to have write a blurb for your book? Would you ever refuse one?
"I actively dislike pretty much all of the new books I’ve read in my supposed “comparable” categories." -- yes, that's my situation entirely. I know I'm supposed to read contemporary books I my genre, but I can't. I don't like them. I'm trying to fix the genre, not conform to it.
And I do think blurbs are part and parcel of the genrefication of the industry. It is no longer about standing out, but about fitting in. It is about proving that you have followed all the rules. Most blurbs, after all, draw on one of about six standard adjectives. It certainly isn't about what they say. It may in part be about who says them. But it is also about further locating a book in the heart of its genre -- which may be why bookstores base buying decisions on them.
And in the indy world. Well, there are really two indy worlds. There is the world of the authorprenuer, in which people are even more genre driven than the trads, and thus pursue blurbs with the same fervor as the trads. And then there are the misfits, who don't want a blurb to make them fit in, but would welcome one that made them stand out.
Almost all my books so far are independently published collections of my panda 'toons. I once somehow got an actual New Yorker cartoonist to write a blurb (not quite sure how that happened) but mostly write my own blurbs (ha ha! problem solved!) in the voices of my cartoon panda characters.
But seriously, it's rare that I read a blurb that moves me to read a book, and more often than not, the blurb leaves me shaking my head when I turn out not to like the book. It does feel like a bit of a racket.